For preschoolers, this is the most pressing issue. We teach not to fight in the kindergarten, but it is inevitable anyway.
Children often cannot share toys or swear because of friends, and we, mothers, run to their aid, inflating the problem to universal proportions.
It is precisely because of our behavior that people incapable of bearing responsibility and protecting themselves grow up.
Child psychologists say that the ability to control their emotional impulses in children is formed only after 4 years. Then you can begin to explain to the child that conflicts are best resolved verbally.
But what if other children are completely unable to control themselves and have a fight for any reason?
I directly allowed my daughter to give back.
Mom does not interfere - this is my principle.
Of course, I can intervene if the child is injured or there is outright bullying by a group of children.
Often, other mothers also do not interfere, and if their child rushes at others, they consider this the norm.
I don’t think so. Hit you? Hit back. And will complain about this his mother - I’ll talk to her already.
And I try to redirect the aggression of my child in the right direction (hobbies, creativity, activities).
Children should learn to regulate their relationships without adult intervention. And it is better to start learning as early as possible.
The same goes for disputes. Especially relevant for large families. I myself am one of those and I remember how, as a child, my mother constantly resorted to “resolve” the situation when my older brothers and sisters started cursing. And what was the result?
Once in school, I did not know how to protect myself and for a long time was considered an outcast. It turned out to get rid of this only to the graduation class, and I do not want the same for my child.
Is it correct? From the point of view of pedagogy - no, from personal maternal experience - yes. I generally take for some example with regard to the upbringing of children in disputes with the French.
I don’t know if you read, but they have a simple rule: parents do not interfere in their children's disputesif it does not come to serious fights. That is, if one child pushed another, and that second cried out, the parent will not run to pick him up and scold the first.
In this way independence, determination, willpower are brought up. Without these qualities, our children simply will not be able to fend for themselves in the future! But life is far from the easiest thing.
Let me be considered a bad mom, but I care about the future of my child in all aspects!
